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During childhood children fight, on many occasions they get angry and even insult each other. It is not that these behaviors go unpunished or have no consequences, but neither can they be confused with bullying. To talk about bullyng, there has to be a harassment continued over time from one child to another. It is not a one-off fight, normally, the aggressor has a provoking behavior and permanent intimidation.
Bullying can be sexual, when there is sexual harassment, induction and abuse; It can be a question of social exclusion when the other is ignored, isolated and excluded; it can be psychological, when there is persecution, intimidation, tyranny, blackmail, manipulation and threats to the other; and can be physical, when the bullied is hit, pushed or organized a beating.
School bullying takes place in educational centers. As it is, for the most part, an invisible bullying for adults, teachers will hardly have knowledge of what is happening through parents. The aggressor harasses the victim in the bathrooms, in the corridors, in the dining room, in the courtyard, reserving his actions during the absence of elders. In some cases, bullying goes beyond the walls of the school, becoming by telephone and even by email.
It is important that parents always maintain open and positive communication with their children, and with the school, in this way, we will make children feel more secure and can tell their reference adults what is happening to them.
However, we should be vigilant if we detect some signs in the child:
1. Changes in your behavior.
2. Mood swings, sadness, or irritability
3. Sleep disorder. That it is harder for him to sleep and he often has nightmares.
4. Changes in eating habits: binge eaters, or lack of appetite
5. They have psychosomatic symptoms. They frequently have somatic pain such as headache or stomach pain without an organic cause that justifies it.
6. They show physical signs. Let us watch in the event that it appears frequently with bumps, or scratches and say that it has fallen.
7. Continued refusal to go to school. When you verbalize that you don't want to go to school, over and over again, especially on Sunday afternoons.
8. Has trouble relating and isolates himself. The child protests not to go to excursions or cultural visits, does not want to interact with his classmates and wants to be accompanied when entering and leaving school.
9. Changes in your school performance. The child may begin to lose interest in studies. You will lack not only interest but also concentration and attention.
If we have detected that our child is a victim of harassment, the first of all is not to blame him or ourselves, that does not mean being worse parents. It is important that the child feels safe and confident in his home, that there is a good climate of trust where he can vent and tell what happens to him.
Another fundamental step will be to talk to the school, sometimes they can ignore what is happening because the attacks are carried out in the absence of the adult.
It is important that the child has social skills and resources, not only focused on defending himself, but also on being more confident. May he learn to be assertive, to be able to say what he wants, what he thinks, without imposing it on others, and knowing that his opinion is as valid as that of others.
That he learns to ignore the aggressor, that he does not show him that he is affected by crying or getting angry, but that he can respond calmly and firmly, saying, for example: "No, that's just what you think."
Let him know that you are not alone and that you can always ask for help.
You can read more articles similar to How to detect if our children are victims of school bullying, in the Bullying category on site.