Active listening or why it is good to let your child unload by crying

Active listening or why it is good to let your child unload by crying

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Draw a princess? Easy !

Milk, pollen, cat hair, mites, peanuts ... tickle your children? You will have to arrange your everyday life to preserve the allergies of the family. Dr. Dominique Château-Waquet, allergist, answers your questions.

Is it enough to flee an allergen to avoid any reaction?

  • Eviction is the most radical measure. When a child is allergic to cat hair, it is best to avoid crossing one. When it is sensitive to a food, it is removed stupidly and as long as it is not in contact with the allergen, your child will be in great shape. The problem is that eviction is not always obvious. Milk, eggs and peanuts are found in most industrial food products. Mites are also present in all houses. It is possible to limit their development by hygiene measures, but your child will meet them at the nanny, nursery or school. Give punctual antihistamine syrup such as Aerius or Primalan, or homeopathic granules to reduce reactions is not enough either. It is necessary very quickly to take care of allergy in a global way to allow a fulfilling and risk free social life.

How to organize this support?

  • The allergist must first prove the potential danger in order to establish a medical certificate and recommendations. It is then necessary to bring the entourage of the child, that is to say all the people who take care of it even occasionally, to become aware of the risks. Grandparents, friends and nannies must absolutely measure the danger of exposure to an allergen.
  • Many people still think that allergy, it happens in the head, it's a new fad and a little butter or a horse ride can not hurt. But that's wrong. If necessary, a doctor's certificate must be presented to prove the potential danger.
  • Finally, it is essential to inform the child of the problem he is suffering as soon as possible. Even worried, he is curious about his body and he can learn very early to formulate what he feels, if it scratches him, if it bothers him, if it makes him want to throw up ... He must feel free to tell adults from his entourage that he can not eat certain foods or be in contact with animals. It's up to you, parents, to talk to him regularly, integrating this information on a daily basis, but without dramatizing it.

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Normal abortion

When a woman becomes pregnant several times, but each pregnancy ends with a miscarriage occurring by the 5th month of pregnancy, it is called having a normal abortion. Her greatest concern is the chances that she has a pregnancy to complete!

What is habitual abortion?

Habitual abortion occurs when at least 3 or more consecutive pregnancies of the same woman end in miscarriage. There is thus a recurrence of miscarriage occurring before the 20th week of pregnancy. That is why he is also called recurrent abortion!

If spontaneous abortion occurs frequently in the first trimester of pregnancy, it is not considered that there is the usual risk of miscarriage.

If the woman has risk factors that can cause miscarriage, then no further research is done. However, when there is a recurrence of abortion in three or more pregnancies, especially occurring in the second trimester of pregnancy, a careful analysis of the causes is required.

What determines the occurrence of habitual abortion?

There are known and treatable causes of this type of abortion, while others remain a mystery to science. The list of causes of recurrent abortion is very long, each risk factor in a pregnancy being a potential cause of repeated abortion. It is also considered that the specific etiology of spontaneous abortion would be appropriate in the usual case. There are several categories of causes:

pathology uterine

Some of the most important causes of miscarriage are congenital malformations of the uterus. These can be easily discovered and avoided if the woman is tested using hereteroscopy, the most effective and reliable method of diagnosing the majority of uterine disorders:

  • uterine malformations (they are considered to cause more than 15% of recurrent abortions);

  • cervical insufficiency (a weakened cervix that can no longer bear pregnancy);

  • uterine synechia;

  • uterine fibroids;

  • uterine hyperplasia.

Chronic diseases

  • chronic kidney disease;

  • Diabetes;

  • hypertension;

  • severe anemia;

  • lack of folic acid in the body;

  • vitamin deficiency (avitaminosis);

  • chronic constipation.

Infectious causes

  • vaginal infections;

  • streptococcal B infection;

  • toxoplasmosis;

  • herpes simplex.

Immunological causes

autoimmune diseases (they are responsible for 10% of recurrent abortion cases).

Paternal causes

  • oligospermia;

  • asthenospermia;

  • teratospermia.

Hormonal disorders

  • Cushing's syndrome;

  • thyroid disorders;

  • polycystic ovary syndrome;

  • insufficient estrogen and progesterone.

Psychological causes

  • depression;

  • strong emotional stress;

  • strong emotional traumas that occurred during pregnancy.

Symptoms of habitual abortion

Even if it occurs in an advanced stage of pregnancy, it still manifests itself through spontaneous abortions, and the symptoms are similar:

  • severe abdominal cramps and pelvis;

  • vaginal bleeding (announces the moment when the fetus has detached from the uterus);

  • uterine contractions (due to the fact that the fetus walks freely through the uterine cavity, after the uterus detachment);

  • emaciation of the body (this symptom appears only if the fact dies before being expelled);

  • excessive redness of the skin (as a result of filling the abdomen with blood).

It can be treated?

It all depends on the most correct diagnosis of the causes of the onset and on the careful detection and analysis of the circumstances in which the multiple abortions took place. Depending on the etiology, the form of treatment is established, so that the woman may be able to carry out a pregnancy.

For example, if it is found that repeated miscarriages have an affective cause, psychological counseling is most appropriate.

If infections are found to cause abortion, then antibiotic treatment may remove the risk of recurrence in future pregnancies.

In the case of malformations of the uterus, surgical methods of removing them are used.

Thus, every possible cause of habitual abortion is investigated step by step and a form of treatment and prevention is instituted in the future. In any case, there is no complete certainty about risk removal when treating the cause. Even so, regular abortion can occur again.

It is not necessary for women who go through these traumatic episodes, both physically and mentally, to give in and give up. Statistically speaking, 85% of the women who went through recurrent abortion finally managed to complete a pregnancy.

Tags Common abortion Spontaneous abortion Recurrent abortion

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Vitamin D for sunshine every day!

On hundreds of years of Madonna sketches, we can find typically cube-headed English-curled babies. Nowadays, this disease is rare - it is only rarely encountered in clinics.

Vitamin D is produced in the body naturally through the sun, with the help of the sun's ultraviolet waves, which synthesize vitamin D from cholesterol. We can also provide enough vitamin D in the form of diet and medicine. Mackerel, anchovies, cod liver oil, vitamin-fortified foods (among them most nutritional supplements), or a drop of vitamin D prescribed by a doctor, are all good sources and ensure healthy development.

What Does Vitamin D Know?

- Increases calcium absorption in the intestine, thus ensuring adequate calcium levels in the blood.
- Vitamin D helps complete the complex process of ossification.
- More recently, they have an important role to play in normal immune response and in ensuring the body's ability to function.
Symptoms of a Failure The XX. In the first third of the 20th century, the heavy, heavily polluted air in England often met with children with stubborn, growth-deficient bones whose deformity was soft (hence the name of the disease). The symptoms have been shown to be caused by a deficiency of vitamin D in the body. In countries where the number of sunny eagles is low, our body cannot provide enough vitamin D.
Rachitis is characterized by the cube head and soft skull bones. The tooth, the well of the well, the wrist widened and the abdomen protrudes. The ossification disorder continues to develop limb bones with "0" or "X" legs. Movement can also be impaired, due to the reduced muscle tone of the child, the child starts to walk and starts to move. In our country, due to vitamin D prophylaxis, healthy children have practically disappeared from vitamin D deficiency.

There is a need for sunlight every day

Equally well-developed, small wells tend to be small, and the appearance of the teeth after 6-8 months is not usually due to vitamin D deficiency, but is a characteristic feature. Do not use high doses of vitamin D as a suspect! In adults, osteoporosis, also known as osteoporosis, can be caused by a deficiency of vitamin D in adults. However, many other factors, such as lack of exercise, hormonal conditions, inadequate calcium and phosphate intake, play a role in this disease and cannot be corrected by vitamin supplementation.

How much should you get?

According to the Hungarian recommendation 400-1000 units of vitamin D per day should be given to each infant before the age of one year. The recommended daily intake of vitamin D is between 500 and 1000 IU for one year up to the age of 18.
Cow's milk is low, with just 40 international units per liter, meaning a child should drink 10 liters of cow's milk a day to get the recommended dose. Breast milk also contains vitamin D, but its level does not reach the amount set by international standards. However, no vitamin D is given, and even healthy breast milk babies would not develop one to two more rickets each year in the midst of our climate, but it is not worth the risk.


In Hungary just II. after a world war, the injections of vitamin D from the Soviet Union contained much more of the active ingredient than what was on the box. As a result, unfortunately, many children suffered from severe kidney disease. Nowadays, in everyday practice, we are dealing with the mild symptoms of overdosing: irritability, constipation, muscle weakness and paleness. Therefore, I emphasize that you should only increase your dose of vitamin D if blood and medical examinations confirm the deficiency. It should also be borne in mind that, in the sun, more vitamin D is produced in the body as a result of the sun.

Sunlight and Vitamin D

As I mentioned earlier, Vitamin D is produced in the skin by 300 nanometers of sunlight. This wavelength does not penetrate the window glass, that is, only the time spent under the open sky! US research has shown that tanning a baby's whole body produces 10,000 units of vitamin D in the skin, which is equivalent to about a monthly dose. The use of high-factor sunscreens counteracts vitamin D synthesis as it effectively prevents UV rays from penetrating the skin for a long time. My number indicates that we can spend several times more days in the day without the danger of the dead, for example, in factor 20: one minute instead of one minute.
Small reflective granules are added to the sun milk, and this effect can be achieved in between. It seems like a bit hot for a factor of over ten, for brown-skinned children around 10, a value of between 15-20 is enough if you stick to the gradual principle. Remember that it is not the brown but the brown one, which has the greatest risk between 11 and 15 o'clock. From the aspect of Vitamin D training in the morning, a bit of dunlut sunlight is just right.
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What do you do when the child is lying?

What do you do when the child is lying?

The lies of children are a natural part of their development, but it is the parents' role to teach them to tell the truth and to correct this type of behavior. Until the little ones understand why it is important to be honest, they will put a few lies in their mouths, but you should not react aggressively and violently, but give them the chance to fix their mistake and apply the default rules!


It is important to encourage the child to always tell the truth. For this to happen, you must develop a well-developed set of rules that will also include the consequences of this type of behavior.

But when you catch him with a lie, you should neither punish him immediately, nor ignore his behavior.

Here are some essential steps in how you should react in those moments.

  • calm down and keep your temper;
  • give the child a chance to confess your lie to yourself and explain why he or she lied to you;
  • ask him what rule you have set for the lie and punishment for this behavior; apply the punishment, but explain it before it happens;
  • encourage him to apologize for his behavior;
  • learn it or find ways together to repair the "lie" or to reward yourself.

Tips from moms in the community

Many moms found themselves in the situation of not knowing what to do if they caught their children with lies and posted the question on the site forum, where other moms shared their experiences about how to react. in the face of children's lies.

"We should not punish them, or at least not too harshly, when we notice that they told us a lie, but rather find out the reason why they did so, talking calmly, patiently, encouraging them to tell the truth. It is good to explain to them that nothing is solved by lying, and that the truth comes out very quickly, and the one who lied will laugh, because telling lies is a shame. " - Andreea_Rainbow

"I think we should also keep in mind that if the measures taken are too drastic, we might get the opposite effect as expected, ie fearing the punishment or reaction of the parents, the child may choose to lie or hide certain things ( lie by omission). " - Deficiency

Tags Children's Lies Punishment Children's Lies Children's Sincerity Children's Discipline Children's Communication